i am thankful

wow. when i have productive days, life genuinely goes upside down. that yc hackathon was so essential. i genuinely thought my dreams were over and that i would just be depressed and lonely at berkeley but that hackathon gave me a glimpse into the world that i had forgotten. idealism is so so so necessary. yet college is where it comes to die. in the job and club and internship rat race, idealism and dreams genuinely get crushed. being in SF and seeing people marvel at the possibilities that the city presented was so touching. it reminded me so much of why i even wanted to do startups in the first place, why i loved SF and why i wanted to build a company there. i forgot just how much money people had, how much they were willing to give, and how many cracked / talented people i could be right next to and in the yc office at that. it was so awesome being able to build with my closest friends, talk and play card games with them, and just have a great time. in this case, winning was genuinely the least of my worries. i didn't give a flying fuck that we didn't place. i'm actually quite happy that we were able to build a working product that we were amazed by when starting at a point of absolute 0. it was fulfilling, and being fulfilled is something that i have been SO desparately chasing this entire time. i love the time i spend with these people. it makes me feel so good. it is an escape from the sort of judgemental, hierarchical nature of college. i crave this freedom so bad, and i am so thankful to have been able to experience it again, especially with my friends who i love dearly. heres to many more dreams, and hopefully a future full of propserity. there is nothing i want to pursue more.